What To Do If My Child Has An Imaginary Boyfriend?

When a child has an imaginary friend, alarm bells often go off. Does my child need help? And if so, when?

Some children have an imaginary friend. They are characters who encourage creativity and express emotions. There is nothing to worry about. It is normal and common for them to appear and to leave. But that is also different in exceptional cases.

Help, my child has an imaginary friend!

In this article, we explain what to do when your child has an imaginary boyfriend . Many children have imaginary friends, characters who stimulate their creativity and help them express their feelings. However, they can become a problem for parents.

These beings created by the vibrant and imaginative minds of children can appear from the age of 2 when the child begins to learn the language and understand the environment in which they live.

There are several reasons why your child makes up an imaginary friend, and in general, such “friends” disappear as easily as they appear.

Parents are surprised to see their child playing and talking alone. If you ask the child what it is about, they calmly answer that they have a new friend. While this can be a source of concern for parents, imaginary friends are part of the child’s emotional development. Sometimes they are related to very creative and sensitive people.

What does science say about it?

A study of 152 children between the ages of 3 and 4, led by researchers Marjorie Taylor and Stephanie Carlson of the Universities of Oregon and Washington, respectively, found that 2 out of 3 toddlers had imaginary friends. 70% of the samples were first-born or only children.

However, it should be noted that there is not necessarily a direct relationship between loneliness and the imaginary friend. In this way, it is understood that the imaginary friend will help the child express his feelings and improve his communication skills.

However, we cannot rule out imaginary friends as signs of emotional disadvantage or concussion. They are also sometimes allies who can help children cope with difficulties such as a parent divorce, the arrival of a new sibling, a change of school, or a change of city or country.

The first thing to do when a child has an imaginary boyfriend is to keep calm. Up to 8 years of age, it is normal for a child to have an imaginary partner. We just have to learn to treat them with respect and affection.

Our tips for dealing with such “friends” are:

Accept the imaginary friend

Avoid ignoring or denying your child’s cocky friend. Treat the situation naturally without promoting or prohibiting the relationship. Remember, for your child it is part of their life.

Get to know the imaginary friend

It is recommended that parents get to know their children’s new boyfriend as they would a normal friendship. Asking for details will tell you what it means to your child and how to better manage them.

The imaginary friend is not an excuse or justification

If your child uses this made-up friend to skip a rule or to commit a prank, don’t let it. Teach him to take responsibility and learn what discipline is, whether or not that character exists.

Encourage encounters with real children

Although attitudes towards these imaginary companions must be respectful and tolerant, encourage your child to meet other children to play and share. This way you can stimulate their psychosocial skills. Probably then the imaginary friends begin to disappear.

When do you have to worry?

In general, when a child has an imaginary boyfriend, there is nothing to worry about. However, if any of the following situations arise, the assistance of a psychologist or therapist is recommended.

• The child isolates himself and prefers to play with the imaginary friend than with real friends.
• Excitement, loss of control, mental confusion, or irritability when the character appears.
• The imaginary friend’s personality is causing your child discomfort or anxiety.

Be vigilant and spend time with your child because the time and attention you give your child is key to spotting real problems.